First a note on weather in Amman:
June: sunny, highs in the upper 80s
July: sunny, highs in the upper 80s
August: sunny, highs in the upper 80s
September: sunny, highs in the upper 80s
What are clouds?
Where is fall? I keep getting confused about the time of year. It's very disorienting when mid-September is exactly the same as mid-June. The monotony is freaking me out. This is a minor complaint though; I hate cold weather so if fall comes two months later, that's fine by me.
Okay. So it's been one week with the new fam. And what a long week it has been. Staying as a guest in someone else's house is always kind of awkward for the first time, right? Even if you know them pretty well, you still feel a bit uncomfortable about things - like using the bathroom in the middle of the night or getting something out of the fridge. But here, that awkwardness is multiplied by about 100, because not only are they strangers, they live in a completely different country, with a completely different culture, and speak a completely different language. Yeah I've lived in Amman for three months, and yeah, I've studied the culture in classes, so I'm aware of a lot of things. But since I'm also a foreigner, I'm not sure what is expected of me and what isn't. It makes things very confusing. I think it would almost be better if I weren't so aware of the culture; then maybe I wouldn't always be worrying about if I'm being rude or not.
So to say the least, this first week was uncomfortable. Like I'd come home flat out exhausted and just want to go in my room and shut the door, but I'm not sure if that's cool. So I don't. I go and I sit with the family and do nothing besides drink Turkish coffee while everyone babbles around me. And when I say sit with the family, I mean for hours. There are ALWAYS people here, and everyone sits on the patio, smokes sheesha, and chats till about 10 or 11 every night. I've just about fallen asleep sitting out there a few times this week. Also, sometimes we have dinner at 10:30 pm. That threw me for a loop the first time it happened. Sunday, I was dead on my feet and could have gone to bed at 7pm. I was doing homework and my host dad told me that at 9pm he was gonna quiz me; being as polite as I am, of course I said okay. So I struggled to stay awake til 9, but 9 came and passed and he said nothing. At 10, he comes and tells me we're having dinner. I was like "seriously?" This is where I learn that the big meal I eat when I get home is considered lunch . . . So anyway, we eat, and then he insists on a "quiz." He turns on the tv to al-jazeera and makes me read the news scroll at the bottom. It's 10:30. I'm about to pass out I'm so tired. The screen is fuzzy. I can't distinguish how many dots are on any of the letters so I keep mixing them up. It was incredibly painful. And now my host dad probably thinks I can't read Arabic.
Also, this was 9/11, so of course that was what they were talking about, and my host dad says to me, in possibly the saddest voice ever, "by the way, I'm really sorry about that." I wanted to cry. Or give him a hug. Mostly I was mortified. "Oh God," I said. "Why are you apologizing? That had nothing to do with you." Jesus. Does he really think I'm one of those Americans? That see all Arabs or Muslims as Osama bin Laden? I felt so bad that he felt he had to apologize. Here he is this normal guy, a sales manager that works an 8-5 desk job, loves football, and wears converse shoes on the weekends, apologizing for some crazy ass dude who lived in a cave just because he also happens to be Muslim and Arab.
However, I don't want to come off as if I don't like this experience. In fact it's quite the opposite. I appreciate the challenge, and I know it will get easier. Plus, my host family is cool, nice, and laid back. Like last night, I went out for the first time since moving in, and my host dad was soo happy. He was like "oh good, I was worried you didn't have friends." And then he told me I could stay out as late as I wanted. "You have a key right, in case we're asleep?" Uh yeah I have a key. But you guys go to bed at like 3 am. "I'll be back by 11 at the latest," I told him. "No, no, stay out as late as you want," he insisted. "Okay. I'll be back by 11." The thing is, there's only so long I can sit at a cafe and talk before I get bored. What does one do 'till 3 am? I don't have the stamina to sit and chat like they do here, unless I'm drinking . . . which I obviously won't be since I'm living in a Muslim household.
Which, speaking of living in a Muslim household - it's been really interesting to observe the things they do so nonchalantly, but that stick out to me. My favorite is how they pray so openly. Like, we'll all be outside sitting in a circle, and the call to prayer will go off, and my host grandma will just go put on hijab, come back out, sit down, turn her chair to face Mecca and pray right there in the middle of everything as the conversation continues around her. Most of the family will go in the house to pray, but it's not like they close doors or anything. At any time, I'll just walk past someone praying, like on my way to the kitchen. It's very cool. Also, I like observing when the women do and don't wear hijab - it depends on who the guests are. So if someone who isn't family is coming over, I get to watch them put it on, which I also enjoy - especially the more stylish ones, who wear a poof under their hijab to make it look really big.
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